The metric system is very efficient. The English language, on the other hand, is not. We have multiple words meaning the same thing, we have obscure words that some people don’t understand, we have no reliable way of comparing some adjectives to others… it’s not a very aesthetic way to communicate- so messy. But never fear! The clean efficiency of the metric system can be applied to language.

It’s simple. A certain length, of more than a meter, can be called a hectometer. Everyone who knows the basics of the metric system (not too hard) knows that a hectometer is one tenth of a kilometer and ten times as much as a dekameter. If I call something “hectocool,” you know exactly what I’m talking about. Since “hecto-” is a prefix denoting a slightly larger than average amount, I think that the thing in questions is pretty cool, but not amazing. If we’re going to be strict, calling something “hectocool” would mean that it was 100 times cooler that something that was just “cool.” However, I don’t think that we need to follow those rules exactly. As long as the hierarchy of preficies is understood, there is no confusion. A table of all the metric preficies I’ve ever heard of is included below.

When using this method of commumication in everyday speeach, it is advisable to pronounce the entire prefix before the word. In written language, however, the symbols for the preficies may be used. I suggest a hyphen between the prefix and the word it modifies. Be sure to pay attention to the capitalization (or lack thereof) of the prefix. Note that the symbols for many opposite preficies are the same letters, with one of them capitalized (see yocto and, symbol y, and yotta, symbol Y). This is a good reason to use full preficies when speaking.

Examples will clarify.

See? It’s very easy, and lets you add meaning and emphasis to your words without making them too complicated. So who will join me in the noble quest? Use the metric preficies, and use them well! Feel free to ask any questions about usage and the like.